"Domine, ad quem ibimus?"

"Lord, to whom can we go?" (John 6:67-69)

My Lord, my Love:
You are impossible sometimes.
Elusive, incomprehensible, outrageous.

I do not comprehend.
I even, sometimes, do not even sense Your presence.
Are You playing hide-and seek?
Or maybe tag?

You've a reputation for asking outrageous things:
to give everything away and follow,
to accept and take up the instrument of my own execution,
to gnaw on Your flesh and drink Your blood for food.

You still command audatious things,
frightening confusing things,
things never before conceived of;
then ask one question:

Will you also go away?

But, there is only one answer.

In the confusion, in the incomprehension,
even in the apparent abandonment.
There is only one place to be.
I know Who has saved me
and from Whence comes my help.
Even in the darkness.

Lord, to whom can we go?
You have the word of life;
everywhere else is death.
You are the Holy One of God,
my Kinsman-Redeemer.

I am staying.
I cannot accept any lover but You,
the all-good, the all-deserving,
no matter what may be.

I have to trust You,
that in time You will make it all make sense.
.